Facebook: If It's Not Broke

Some clever big wigs behind social network phenomenon Facebook have decided the current smooth running of the site is simply not enough. No doubt keeping the Facebook site builders busy and in employment, CEO Mark Zuckerburg has announced the roll out of the dreaded timeline, which is currently optional but due to become mandatory for all users.


The timeline in short is a hazy inaccurate scrap book of your life - well at least your life since you joined the website. Making it easily accessible to view every wall comment, status, or picture tag & upload simply by hitting the year in which you (or your friends) want to visit.

Facebook is a fantastic tool which helps you to stay in touch with people that without it you probably would have long forgotten. Its a great way to speak to distant family members, old school pals and those friends who've moved away, making it difficult to visit them on a regular basis.

After finding out someone I didn't want to know the ins & outs of my daily life could access my profile via a mutual friend, I made a conscious decision around a year ago to only update my status with silly jokes, general social commentary or inane chatter about my dog, TV or the weekend which I would be indifferent about strangers knowing.


My profile has always been set to private and I only have people on my friends list whom I actually know & have met at one time in my life or another. My true friends who I actually still make the effort to see, I can probably count on two hands. These are the friends whom I have no qualms about sharing all aspects of my life with. Whilst of course I like all the people on my friends list, most are just acquaintances, some I've not seen for years. Despite what someone's profile leads you to believe - no one actually has 500+ friends.

So what do I expect to see on my timeline? I travelled. I went to a party. I was unhappy. I was drunk. I got angry. I was bored. I had a Chinese takeaway. I hated someone. I watched a TV series. I went shopping twice in one weekend. All statements I would never dream of immortalising if I was making a psychical scrapbook - so why does Facebook feel it necessary to allow me & my friends to revisit these times? Why on earth would I (or my fiance) want to see photo's or wall posts from ex partners, read an irate status that is long forgotten or be reminded of old friends who we no longer associate with?

As I'm getting older (& possibly more boring) I'm finding Twitter much more suited to my needs. The conundrum of posting your entire life in words and pictures on Facebook is becoming increasingly alien to me, despite the fact I had a very different view just a few years ago.


A survey independent from Facebook conducted in 2010 suggested that old partners, ex friends & enemies or those who only know of you through degrees of separation are more likely to access your public profile on a regular basis than your actual friends.

Thanks to Facebook I know the ins and outs of the lives of babies and toddlers whom I've not actually ever met. You are bombarded with only the positive rose tinted tidbits implying a perfectly warped impression of parenting without the mundane or frustrating aspects.


Other users openly declare their Doctors latest diagnosis on returning from the GP. Katy's had cystitis twice in 3 months & Michelle's benefit payments are paid fortnightly Tuesday


Some crudely imply they've 'just had a good ol' session' forgetting Catholic great aunt Mary is on their friends list. One will openly update all 500 of their online friends of their tragic struggle battling mental illness & another is blase about discussing their pending day as the accused in court.


Some even speak with those whom previously they never had many dealings, thanks to the equivocal weak link that both parties happen to have children. (Like millions of other women in the country). This entails liking and commenting on each others sprog-related status updates. Every. single. one. of. them.


"Did you breastfeed & have a natural birth?" ...Well I tried to breastfeed once & had a C section, but OMG! lets now forge a friendship based on this tenuous link!

I will cringe at what I wrote just 2-3 years ago no doubt, along with the many(!) photos I took from the age of 15 onwards but at least I am responsible for putting them there.


As the generation of Facebooked children become adults. Developing little personalities of their own and inevitably become computer literate internet savvy grown ups. I'm not sure they are going to appreciate that Mum & Dad's Facebook timeline - which is no doubt permanently archived on the web forever - is public viewing for them ...or their teasing school friends.


It's bad enough I cringe when my Mum gets my baby album out purely for the amusement of my fiance, let alone having 2,749 of them for the whole world to see at a click of a mouse.

Facebook is persistently redesigned when it doesn't need to be. It worked perfectly fine as it was with the previous basic but functional layouts, without the live post ticker, scarily accurate photo recognition tagging technology and without the facility to chat in real time.


As the timeline roll out looms it does make you question; if it was never broke in the first place - why are Zuckerburg & co constantly trying to fix it?



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